Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Momma Law #1
Growing up in the south, there were certain things my mother insisted upon. There were the usual instructions like, DO NOT EMBARASS ME IN PUBLIC! and NO CURSING IN PUBLIC! and NO FIGHTING IN PUBLIC! There was one rule however, which was specific to me because I was the only girl.
THOU SHALT NOT JIGGLE!
When I was younger, this simply meant wearing pantyhose with a dress. I started wearing pantyhose when I was all of 14 years old. Then I put on a little weight and the spandex turned into those biker shorts with a high waist to keep the tummy looking flat in addition to control top pantyhose.
Then I ate myself into a size "OH MY GOD I'M HUGE". Because of my enormouse size, I have suffered a new level of humiliation related to Momma's Law #1. I had to buy and wear my first girdle. Life is now hard and a diet will be coming very quickly to my belly.
I would blame it on my kids, but I got down to a really cute size 6 after they were born. The only thing I can really blame on them are my stretch marks.
Now, you can all thank me for not posting a picture of my stretch marked belly or the girdle!