Monday, September 27, 2010

Good Night

Tonight, Trip was feeling especially rambunctious. I sent him in to say good night to Big Daddy Awesome with instructions to give Daddy a hug. What did Big Daddy Awesome get? A punch in the stomach! Followed by uncontrollable giggling. Why do little boys act like that?

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Flashlight pictures

Big Daddy Awesome has a fascination with office gadgets. His newest gadget is a combination key chain, flashlight, bottle opener, and flashlight with his business information on it. Big Daddy Awesome is one happy guy. He loves his gadgets. The munchkins take after him. They found a cache of the key chains and I found them hiding in my closet. They though they were in trouble, but I broke out the iphone and started snapping pictures of them.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Boys, edited

I've been experimenting with the editing feature on my computer. This is closer to what my munchkins looked like on their first day of school. Those shirts will be permanently stained within the month. I don't really know how they end up with so many stains on their shirts. Do they actually eat their lunches at school? Or do they just use their food to paint their shirts?


This is my brother Brian. He's trying to look cool and debonair for my blog post about him. I'm actually about 3 months late doing this post. Better late than never, right?

Brian is significantly younger than me. Please don't think "obviously."

Brian is the product of a second marriage for my mother. We were raised together, so we usually don't refer to each other as half-siblings. Brian's father, at the time of Brian's birth, was a non-practicing Jew. My mother was an Episcopalian and thought it was rather cool that she had married a Jewish man and had a child who was 1/4 Jewish genetically.

With my mother thinking it so cool that Brian was 1/4 Jewish, Brian naturally thought it was pretty cool that he was Jewish. Once he reached age 4 or 5, he started asking what it meant that he was part Jewish. His father was not practicing on his most generous days and agnostic or an atheist on the rest of his days, so he refused to tell Brian anything about his Jewish heritage. So Brian only had our mother to tell him what is meant to be Jewish. What did she tell him? That Jewish people were really good with money. So what did Brian do? He decided that he would hoard any money he earned until absolutely necessary to spend said money.

Then South Park came along. South Park is great viewing material for 5 year olds. Until you've had an episode of South Park repeated to you, verbatim, and at least 4 times a week by a 5 year old, you haven't lived. Brian, at the tender, young age of 5, then saw Jewish satirical humor weekly. Being 5, he didn't understand that the show was making fun of the stereotypes of Jewish people.

Then, satirical cartoon humor progressed and we were given Family Guy. I don't remember exactly when Family Guy first aired, but we quickly found Brian's double on Family Guy. Brian had become Mort the Jew. He can imitate the whiny, nasal voice of Mort. Brian would love nothing more that to be able to grow a "Jewfro" similar to Mort's. Obviously, he can't! And for some strange reason, Brian is as injury prone as Mort the Jew.

On our family trip to Williamsburg this year, Brian sustained multiple injuries just by being himself. I can't remember what he did to his hand, but he had stitches in his hand before the plane ever left the ground. I got to cut them out with sewing scissors!!

Brian also went on the trip to the beach with J where they both got miserably sunburned. Brian, aka Mort, got tossed around by the waves of the ocean and thrown down by the water which bruised his foot. He thought it was broken. Mom wanted him to get an x-ray. Mom got overruled.

He really, really loves me for posting this picture of him topless and sunburned!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Snake

This is my sweet mother. She has one very dark sense of humor. She can occasionally be as tough as nails. I went over to visit with her tonight and she reminded me of a story I think some of you might enjoy. A little back ground information is needed first. My mother is a small woman. In her youth, she was 5 feet 3 inches and proud she was that tall. She was a bit of a tomboy as a child and has loved the outdoors all of her life. Whenever there is a job to be done, she will volunteer and work until said job is complete.

Twelve years ago, my petite, tomboyish mother had to clean out my grandfather's house in the country so it could be sold. My grandfather lived out in the country in Oklahoma. To say my grandfather's house was in a state of disrepair would be a major understatement. He accumulated more and more junk in his last five years in the house and really wasn't able to clean anything or do any repairs on the house. It was sad, but he moved to a retirement home and ended up being much happier.

So my mother took on the onerous task of cleaning out his house mostly by herself. My brothers and I would help her when we could. I don't remember why no one went up with Mom on his particular day, but for some reason, she found herself cleaning out the garage by herself.

Is your spine tingling yet? Do you know what's going to happen? It should be obvious something bad is about to happen. This is a story about my mother, after all.



She was moving a pile of firewood that had been stored in the garage.


Chop, freaking chop!

My petite little mom was cleaning out the garage with an ax in one hand just in case she found a snake laying in wait.

So, she chopped off it's head! That's what you're supposed to do when a huge, poisonous snake is staring at you. I think she stepped on it's head or upper neck so it couldn't try to bite her while she was taking care of her newfound problem. She's kind of smart like that.

I'll kill a spider any day, but I draw the line at reptiles that could kill me. I will run away from a snake as fast as I can. Then I'll call my mom to take care of it.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Peanut Butter Pie

Before I get to the recipe, I just want to say that I accept all manner of gifts. Make this and you will want to send me diamonds and cash and airline vouchers good for trips to New York City. You've been warned!

This is my Peanut Butter Pie. I originally got this recipe from Cooking Lite Magazine. The only ingredient I left low fat was the peanut butter because it's the only one that effects the flavor. When peanut butter is made lowfat, the manufacturers add in sugar. All of the other ingredients end up with a chemical aftertaste when they are low fat or fat free. That's just my humble opinion. Make this pie and you'll agree with me!

The lineup:

1 cup low fat peanut butter
8 oz cream cheese
1 can sweetened condensed milk
1 cup powdered sugar
12 oz frozen whipped cream
2 regular sized graham cracker pie crusts
chocolate syrup (like Hershey's)

Mix the first 3 ingredients in a stand mixer. Add in the powdered sugar and combine. Add in the frozen whipped cream and combine. Scrape down the sides of the of the bowl and mix a bit more until the pie filling has a smooth consistency. Pour half of the filling into each pie crust. Put the plastic tops back on each pie and freeze for at least 6 hours.

The pies will be mostly solid, but will melt quickly. Top with a drizzle of chocolate syrup.

When you make these pies, serve a small sliver of pie and make sure you've got a large crowd to feed. It's so sweet that you can't eat a large piece before your mouth begs you to stop from sugar overload.

My Birthday Present from the Boys

I threw myself a birthday party last week for turning 32!! During my frenzy of cleaning and cooking for the party, my sweet munchkins announced they were going to make their beds for the party! This is the result of their labor. I almost teared up when I saw how sweet they had been.

First Day of School!

The munchkins have started kindergarten!! I finally have the first day of school pictures to share. As you can see, they are more interested in casual clothes. The idea of denim in the summer will cause histrionics instanteously. And it's days like these that I'm so very grateful that I have boys. They pick out their own clothes in the morning and in their eyes, they match well enough. They own one pair of tennis shoes, one pair of sandals, and one pair of cleats each. There is no arguing in the morning about shoes because sandals aren't allowed at school.

I was forced this week to go down the girl toy aisle to get a birthday present for a friend. I was traumatized by the pinkness of the whole aisle. I couldn't handle the frilly, pink, sparkly sensory overload. Every time we go to a girl's birthday party, I become so much more grateful that I have boys!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Bulldog Corner of Shame

Annabelle has exiled herself to the Bulldog Corner of Shame.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

The Poor, poor Tooth Fairy!!

I've never really worried about my munchkins being "normal", but there are some things I thought were universal. Like loose teeth for instance. I didn't think there was ever a child who had a loose tooth and didn't mess with it for days before it finally fell out. I was pretty sure there was a law somewhere about fiddling with loose teeth.

And then there was Logan.

I have been checking their teeth for a year and a half, waiting for their first loose tooth. Yes, I am anal like that. Maybe I was more excited about them loosing teeth than they were. I explained to them that their teeth would fall out and new ones would grow back in their place. Shouldn't that be fascinating to a little boy?? Mine showed mild interest to placate me.

So a few weeks ago, Logan's first tooth fell out. We were getting ready to go to swimming lessons and I was trying to usher the boys out the door. Logan was ignoring me and holding a towel to his mouth. I demanded to know what he was doing and he showed me the blood on the towel. He had never noticed his tooth being loose until the tooth literally fell out in his hand.

Several weeks later, at a previously scheduled dentist appointment, we had x-rays taken of their teeth and Logan was going to lose a second tooth within a couple of weeks. I want to stress that I did not take my kids to the dentist to get x-rays just to see when their teeth were going to fall out. The appointment was scheduled six monthes ago at their last appointment. I'm a freak, but I'm not going to get my kids x-rayed to find out when they're going to lose a couple of teeth. Trip's first tooth will be a few more months!

Since Logan's second tooth was so close to falling out, I asked him every few days if the tooth was loose. He'd claim ignorance, refuse to let me check, acquiesce finally and let me check only for the tooth to not be loose.

And then finally, we were out eatng Mexican food one night. Logan was going to eat nachos, so I asked him about the tooth. The tooth was hanging on by the smallest piece of tissue. I couldn't believe he hadn't noticed it before then. Big Daddy Awesome and I then proceeded to tell Logan every three minutes to make sure he didn't swallow the tooth. Can you guess what happened? If you guessed he swallowed the tooth, you would be absolutely right!

How do you not feel the tooth leave your gums? How do you not notice a tooth while you are chewing your food? Does he chew his food?

Being the slightly disturbed mother I am, I told him the Tooth Fairy was going to have to wait until he pooped out the tooth and then find the tooth in his poop before he could get any money from her. He believed me. Why wouldn't he? Mothers don't lie to their children about important things like the Tooth Fairy or tooth retrieval!

So we got home and I forgot about the tooth. Four days later, I finally remembered to leave a dollar under his pillow. I went to work the next morning before the sun broke over the horizon and assumed my munchkin would find his dollar. He didn't. I asked Big Daddy Awesome if Logan had found his tooth all day long. They were all at home. Apparently, the munchkins never made it back up to their bedroom. So, Logan found his dollar when I was putting him to bed that night.

He holds up his dollar in he air and says, "Look Mom! The tooth fairy ate the poop off of my tooth and gave me a dollar!"

You're welcome for the visual!