Saturday, October 30, 2010


The munchkins have, I think, finally reached an age where they will remember details about their childhood. With Halloween being tomorrow, I really think they'll remember trick-or-treating. They've had their costumes for almost a month. I decided this year that I would not spend the day before Halloween picking through the leftovers at Target trying to find a suitable costume. The costumes were not on sale, but my kids will be what they want to be for Halloween.

You might think with all that planning, I would be taking them trick-or-treating. I'm not. Big Daddy Awesome is not. Neither are any of their grandparents. (Wait a second. The Mom of the Year people are knocking on my door to give me an award.)

None of us planned on the Texas Rangers making it all the way to the World Series. Not even Big Daddy Awesome who is the biggest Ranger fan in the world. BDA is a 1/8 owner of some season tickets for the Rangers. Can you guess when our tickets are? Sunday. After all of my planning, I will not be home to take my kids trick-or-treating. BDA claims that the munchkins will one day understand why we left them on Halloween to watch the Texas Rangers play in the world series and I know they will one day. I just wonder if I'll still be alive when they do.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Stir Fried Beef

It's been forever since I posted a recipe and I thought I'd share one of my favorites. This recipe is very versatile and I usually chose the ingredients based on what looks good in the produce section. The most important tip I can share is that you DEFINITELY need to have everything chopped, sliced, and diced before you even think about turning on the stove. Ok, not diced. I never dice anything. You really want larger pieces in this dish.

And, thanks to the stats option of blogger, I just found out that someone from Russia has been visited my blog. How awesome is that?

Absolutely necessary ingredients:

2-3 Tbsp Olive oil
2 cloves garlic, minced (or a good spoonful from your jar of minced garlic)
1/2 lb steak or chicken, cut into 1 inch cubes
1 Tbsp garlic powder
2-4 Tbsp ginger powder (Yes, TABLESPOONS)
1/2 cup soy sauce, plus more to taste

Optional ingredients, but chose at least 3

1/2 head of cabbage, cut into 1 inch squares
1 bag of broccoli florets (Don't hate me. Buy the whole thing and chop it if you want.)
1-2 zucchini, cut in half longways and sliced (depending on size)
1-2 yellow squash, cut in half longways and sliced
1 pkg button mushrooms, sliced
1/2 lb green beans, trimmed

Heat your wok over medium heat. Get your wok hot before you ever put the olive oil in it. The instruction manual on your wok says to do this. Trust me. Pour in the olive oil. You want about 1/8 inch of olive oil in the bottom of the wok. Toss in the garlic and let it cook for about 30 seconds. Add in the steak or chicken. Add in the granulated garlic and the ginger powder. Stir the meat mixture to get it cooked on all sides, 3-5 minutes. Take the steak or chicken out of the wok and put it in a bowl. Add in the cabbage and/or broccoli. Stir to coat it with the spices still in the wok. Put the meat or chicken on top of the cabbage and/or broccoli. Pour in the soy sauce. If you're using cabbage, add in about 1/2 cup of water. Let this cook for about 10 minutes, stirring occasionlly. Once the cabbage and/or broccoli is softened, add in any of the other vegetables. Stir to combine. Add in more soy sauce, if needed. Let the whole mixture cook for another 10 minutes, stirring occasionally.

If you're using steak, you don't need to add in any other sauces.

If you're using chicken, the dish is better with some kind of sauce. My favorite is peanut sauce. We also like plum sauce.


Tuesday, October 12, 2010


Tonight, my brother J sent me a picture of a finger missing it's tip. It was a fuzzy picture of his finger. Turns out it was only the skin missing. Kind of disappointing. As my demons laughed at their uncle's wimpiness, I asked J if I could tell a story here about one of his finer moments of dating communication. Yes, he does suffer from the same foot-in-mouth disease which I endure. Suffer may be a strong term. J thoroughly enjoys his foot-in-mouth disease and retelling said encounters later for others.

But being a mom to demons, I had to do the mom thing before I could blog. There was what a funny story about the boys here, but Big Daddy Awesome thought the boys might not appreciate that story being told about them in the future, so it's gone. Now that I've had a chance to vent about my demons, it's time for J's story!

J was more popular than I was in high school, although I'm not sure he ever really knew it or that it mattered to him. There was never a shortage of obnoxiously giggly girls waiting for J to show them the slightest amount of attention. In his freshman year of high school, J started "going with" one of his classmates. "Going with someone" was the high school equivalent of dating.

The relationship had lasted for 3 or 4 weeks when this event occurred. Their "relationship" consisted of eating lunch together at school and phone calls. There may have been a chaperoned date to the movies. They were 15 years old. Not much else should be happening.

So one day, they are eating lunch together with a group of her friends. J has a package of chips on a plate covered in melted, processed cheese product. I'm not going to pretend that I was a food snob in high school, but who approved that for cafeteria provided lunches? Did a velveeta knock off brand send a school cafeteria buyer a bribe? How can that be remotely healthy for growing teenagers? Back to my story. J is eating the chips and processed cheese product. And the girlfriend whips out a can of cherry pie filling and a can opener. She then proceeds to open the can of PIE FILLING and eat the ENTIRE can!!! She is then not satisfied and asks J if she can have some of his chips and processed cheese product. J looks at her and says, with a straight face, "I think you've had enough to eat for today."

I don't know who left the table first, though I think it was probably her. The inevitable break up happened that day.

J was not remorseful in the least over what he said. He may have been bored with the girl already. He enjoyed telling me and our mother and anyone else who would listen about what he had said.

I'd consider enjoying my foot-in-mouth disease more, but I think I just come off as pretentious, while my brother comes of as hilarious and charming.

Monday, October 4, 2010

You want to know what which word means???

Bedtime has a special mother-son feel for us. It's a time for story book reading, cuddling, and conversations at the end of the day. That being said, we usually wrap up all of that mother-son time in about 20-30 minutes. I have a blog to write after all. Sometimes, the bed time ritual is sweet. Sometimes, there is cursing. Sometimes, there are tears, mine or theirs. It hurts to be tackled by a 52 lb munchkin. Trip often tells me that he wants to talk to me about his day. Logan occasionally wants a word defined, which was the case several weeks ago.

Mama, what does sex mean?

Me, coughing, sputtering, looking wildly around for the adult in the room to answer this kid's question. No such adult existed.

I slowly regained my composure.

Logan, I'm not ready to define that word for you yet.

But Mom!

Where did you hear that word?

And I found my inner adult! Did you see it?

I heard it on Family Guy.


So, we stopped watching Family Guy for a while. Which then turned into me and Big Daddy Awesome watching Family Guy after the boys had gone to bed. Then, Big Daddy Awesome started letting the boys watch the Family Guy Star Wars movie. Can you see where this leads? My kids need to be in bed by 6:30 every night so we can watch tv. Or not. Eventually, we lost the "No Family Guy" rule.

In all fairness to Family Guy, Logan did ask me occasionally over the next few weeks to define sex for him again without seeing Family Guy. I'd refuse to define it and that would end the discussion. Or so I thought. Apparantly, Logan's little mind was hard at work over this new and fascinating word that Mom wouldn't define. Little demon. I think he's possessed.

So a couple of nights ago, the boys and I are in their bedroom, doing our nightly routine. We've read 3 books. They're both cuddled up to me. And then Logan decides that the time is right to make his request of me.

Mom, I want you and Dad to have sex so I can have a little sister.

What in the hell has happened to my innocent little baby? Why would he say such a thing to me? A freaking sister? Is he crazy? Who filled his head with a freaking definition that I didn't want him to have yet?

So I choked again.

Logan, what do you think that word means?

It's something Moms and Dads do to make a baby. I want a sister.

Who told you what that word means?

My brain thought it up. My brain is smart.

Really kid? He doesn't even blink when he's telling me this. I think he may have really deduced this on his own. Why on earth does he want a sister? Is Big Daddy Awesome telling him to ask for a sister?

I told him that the conversation was over until he was 10 years old and there would be no baby sister.

I don't mind my children being the ones to enlighten their friends' vocabularies on the playground with 4 letter words, but I am not ready for that big talk yet.