Peroxide removes blood stains from clothes!

I despise cleaning my house. I'm not good at it. On the rare occasion I am forced to participate in such a barbaric activity, it either takes me an unreasonable amount of time to finish the cleaning, or it doesn't get finished. I therefore find it completely reasonable to pay someone else to clean my house on a weekly basis. The house gets cleaned in about 5 hours and I get to come home to a clean house that smells wonderful. I have, however, been forced to learn a few handy tricks over the years.

1. Peroxide removes blood stains from clothing!

While this tip is useful when raising little boys, and I assume will become more useful as they get older, the absolute best reason to know this tidbit of information is so you can post it on your unsuspecting friends' facebook pages.

Simply pour peroxide directly onto the blood stain on the fabric. Take off the clothing first. Then wash as you normally would.

2. White vinegar, or a mixture of 1/2 white vinegar and 1/2 water, will remove the odor of urine (and probably almost any other odor) from furniture.

If you just spout off these two facts, people may think you are involved in violent crime. Make up an alias and regale them with stories of your crime sprees. It'll be much more entertaining than simply admitting you have little boys who have trouble "aiming" or occasionally wet the bed. This may also be a useful tip if you frequently host frat parties involving vast quantities of cheap beer and mattresses strewn about various bedrooms. I have never hosted such a party, but it seems like a plausible situation.

I keep a spray bottle with 1:1 white vinegar and water around the house for guests and little boys who have aiming difficulties.

3. My last tip actually involves the pictures above. We went to a friend's house last weekend to swim. My girl friend sprayed down Yogan with sunscreen while I was putting on Tripper's floaties and then we switched kids. They played in the pool for hours and had a fantastic time. When the sun was setting and it was time for the boys to get out of the pool, they whined and complained and finally got out. Yogie's arms, which had been sprayed with sunscreen and then had his floaties put on, were covered with the paint from the floaties. The spray sunscreen and the paint on the floatie had reacted, leaving a "tattoo" on my child. "Tattoo" was his word, not mine. Fantastic blogger that I am, I have no pictures to show you of the paint.

Rubbing with a towel did nothing. Soap and water did nothing. Rubbing alcohol and alot of friction finally did the trick.



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Now, dear reader, here is where you come in. I have a white refrigerator. I like my refrigerator. It hold food and keeps said food cold. It does not cost me any more money other than the cost of electricity. It has many, many years left of usefulness. One full side and a couple of places on one door were colored on by the munchkins with dry erase marker about three years ago. I have tried everything I could think of to remove the marks, but so far, nothing has worked very well. Any suggestions?